Tyler Durden (
tyler_gone) wrote2009-04-05 08:32 pm
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25 Unicorn Street, Sunday Evening
The zombie had spent an indignant day locked inside a reinforced closet, alternately chowing down on pork brains and trying to chew or claw his way through the door. He was missing the battle, and that would displease his master.
He was still pounding at the door with fists that had long since turned to mush when the curse lifted.
The fists became living, if scarred, flesh and bone once more, but Tyler kept pounding at the door for a moment.
Then he stopped. Maybe if he closed his eyes and didn't move, people would forget about him entirely until he had actually died of embarrassment. He sat on the closet floor, wishing he had some gum or something to get the taste of pork brains out of his mouth.
And he really didn't want to know why his pockets felt so lumpy.
[OOC: For anyone who lives there, or who might otherwise want to let him out.]
He was still pounding at the door with fists that had long since turned to mush when the curse lifted.
The fists became living, if scarred, flesh and bone once more, but Tyler kept pounding at the door for a moment.
Then he stopped. Maybe if he closed his eyes and didn't move, people would forget about him entirely until he had actually died of embarrassment. He sat on the closet floor, wishing he had some gum or something to get the taste of pork brains out of his mouth.
And he really didn't want to know why his pockets felt so lumpy.
[OOC: For anyone who lives there, or who might otherwise want to let him out.]
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.. later.
"I killed two people." At least two. Two who he recognized. "What - what is this?"
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Nathan had killed far, far more than two people. Maybe if he'd bothered to look, he might have recognized them, too. But he learned a long time ago that trying to recognize the people you were killing was never a good move. Not unless you were hoping it was them.
"It's over, whatever it is."
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"How am I back in one piece? Is everyone?"
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He offered a wry sort of smile, at that. "Whatever damage was done, it looks like the worst of it from here on in is going to be what's in the mind."
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A chair. Sitting. Sitting was good. "It's pretty fucked up, in my head," Tyler cautioned, closing his eyes, then blurted, "... I sacrificed a deer for the voodoo priest."
And the other voice in his head was having itself a nice long laugh at his guilt. He firmly shoved it back.
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Look, he'd locked the guy in his closet overnight. He would investigate the door when he had the stomach to do so. "A glass of water, or something?"
He had almost said 'whiskey.' He'd get to that after the water.
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He couldn't say water. "The largest glass of booze you can pour me. Please."
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"The shower is down the hall. I think the Armani should fit you decently until you get into your own clothing. And if you don't mind whiskey, I can provide."
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He came out 20 minutes later, after the shower started to run cold and he'd dressed himself.
"Tell me everything," he said. "Whiskey first, but then I want to know everything since I was chewing on Tony's mask."
A grimace passed over his face at that lovely memory.
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Like the whole 'knowing about zombies and then not saying anything about them' thing.
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"The field trip on Monday, for the school's gun club. It was a good idea. Go to the mall. Play paintball. The zombies weren't invited, but they showed up regardless."
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"We fought our way out. Baseball bats and axes and whatever else the mall could provide to be used as weapons, and everyone made it back in one piece. I stood by the portal. I thought it had closed."
The more he spoke, the more he figured that he really, really wanted to borrow that bottle back.
"Maybe it did. Maybe these are different zombies with very lousy timing. I doubt it." Nathan shook his head, keeping his eyes on Tyler if only because staring at the floor would have seemed entirely too much like he was trying to dodge the blame. "I should have told someone. Looking back, I'm not entirely certain why I didn't."
Aside from the hiding in a bottle and the freaking out and... Well. And the dancing. All flimsy excuses, so he'd suck it up and admit that he had no excuse at all.
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He repressed that hot flare of anger, too.
"You thought it was over," he said. "Anyhow, maybe there's nothing anyone could have done. Not like we can go back and change it, anyhow."
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He wasn't going to say he was sorry. He didn't deserve the self-indulgence that an apology would bring. Not in the face of what Tyler had been through. Saying he was sorry was too much like asking for forgiveness, and that was something he would never beg of anyone.
He had a slightly twisted view of the world.
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He took another long pull from the bottle before offering it over. "We must have come close to losing the island."
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"Entirely too close," Nathan agreed. And then he allowed himself to take a long pull of whiskey. "There was an assault taking place on the dorms while we were storming the priest's lair. Every day, the radio read off the names of the casualties."
He didn't need to add that it was a nightmare. Tyler probably knew that first-hand.
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"Did anyone die?"
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He took one more long drink, effectively draining the bottle do just about its halfway point (he was going to feel it hard and fast and right away, and he was just fine with that), before holding it back to Tyler.
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Tyler took another long sip; thanks to his empty digestive system, he was already tipsy.
It wasn't exactly making him feel good.
"Students always end up fighting in things like this," he said, concentrating hard so he wouldn't slur. "Dunno if it's the right thing. Good they have real battles to fight, but -- not like this. But it's like I keep telling Tony, they aren't exactly kids."
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The two students who had been on his team had fought very well. He knew better than to think for a moment that either of them were even remotely new to a battlefield.
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"I've heard of worse reasons to start," he decided to say, instead.
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"As is mine," he decided. "I don't think I appreciated how bad other places might actually have fallen until showing up here. And I appreciate it now more than ever before."
He wasn't allowed to reach for the bottle back.
"The gremlins helped, too."
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"For the sake of what little is left of my dignity, I would prefer you continue thinking that it was a vivid zombie hallucination," Nathan replied. And that wasn't a pout. It only looked like one. "Actually, I was referring to the siege on the priest's lair."
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Hey. The whiskey had just kicked in!
"There was a... gremlin... anti-voodoo good-karma witch-doctor chant thing." He swayed for a moment, and then decided that now was as good a time as any to find a place to sit. "And I was a tiger."
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"That's pretty fucking hardcore."
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He'd need the devil's own luck if he wanted to drag what had happened out of the West Team, probably.
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"You should. I appreciate you and Tony and Steve sticking me in the closet before I could bite anybody else," he said. "That saved my world a little, right there."
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"I would expect it was something that would have been done for any one of us, were the situation different," Nathan decided. Or, at least, he hoped that they would.
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Said the guy who dressed in a wardrobe that originated in the mid-to-late 1800s.